Friday 18 January 2019

Interview with an Earthling (Part 1)

Extraterrestrial Interviewer (Eti): A hypothetical entity of non human intelligence from a non-earth based technological and space faring civilisation.

Earthling Interviewee (Aman): A forty-six year old male from the land mass area of planet Earth known in his time as England. This specimen has been chosen for the interview simply because of his willingness to participate.

Eti: Hello Earthling and thank you for agreeing to take part in this interview.

Aman: Hi, it's a privilege to do so and thank you for selecting me from all the applicants.

Eti: OK, so lets get started. Whenever the subject of Earthlings comes up among our people we find that this question repeatedly comes up. What is it that you actually want?

Aman: Hmmm....not sure how to answer that one really as it changes from moment to moment if I am honest.

Eti: Can you give me any specific examples?

Aman: Well, some days all I really want is to be alone with my own thoughts, but other times what I really want is to enjoy the company of other people. There are times when I really want personally indulgent things like a bottle of whiskey, or a good smoke, or a curry for example. I certainly want to better myself though, and contribute to a better world. Some kind of meaning or purpose to life also I guess, and, well, a better world really, for everyone, you know?

Eti: That's an interesting list! My people would probably not all be familiar with some of these references so can you take me through them one by one please?

Aman: OK, I will try!

Eti: You say some days you want to "be alone with your own thoughts". As a member of a species whose primary form of communication is what you may call "telepathic" or "empathetic" this concept is rather alien to us. Can you describe what you mean by it please?

Aman: Well, it's enjoying time and space to go over things in my own mind, try and get my thoughts and feelings together - less scattered and disorganised. An opportunity to process my emotions and get in touch with what I, myself, really think, believe and feel about something, without being influenced or distracted by the presence of other peoples ideas or emotional state. It's private time really I suppose, an opportunity to be still and quiet and calm the inner storm of ideas and emotions that are constantly moving about inside me. Errm, does that make any sense?

Eti: Yes, it does but only because I understand your species to be massively retarded, no offence meant! From our perspective of course this is somewhat irrelevant really. We experience the stillness of infinite awareness within the non-local consciousness state at all times and therefore would not have any need or desire for specific "time" to "get in touch" with what we think or feel. Are you saying that you are unfamiliar with this state of being? Or that you can only be in such a state when you are alone?

Aman: ......Gosh! I'm not really sure what you mean. I think you are describing something that we would call "transcendent", the kind of thing we only really are capable of achieving through very disciplined and focused meditation. I suppose in all of my 46 years I could say I have experienced something like this once or twice, but fleeting moments you know? To be in that state constantly? Wow! I simply cannot imagine what that would be like!

Eti: I see. Thank you. So moving on then you also say that at times you want to enjoy the company of others. What enjoyment do you derive from this?

Aman: Well it varies I suppose, depending on the who, where and when of it, you know? I mean it may be time with mates and enjoying a chit chat and a laugh (that whiskey or smoke may come into that too), or it could be more intimate time with a close friend talking about personal stuff, getting deep you know? Like, giving and receiving emotional support, sometimes even physical intimacy erm, you know, sex and stuff ahh ,err hah! Well anyway it's also about sharing ideas, discussing current events or even sometimes discussing you guys!

Eti: So you do get together sometimes to discuss my people?

Aman: Oh yes! We are always speculating as to whether you exist or not for one thing. Or say, are you "good" or "evil", stuff like that.

Eti: ..... OK...continue please.

Aman: Well it could be anything really, socialising you know? Like time down the pub, or going to a movie, or to see a band we all enjoy, or a theatre show.

Eti: So it is about entertainment primarily?

Aman: Not always no. Sometimes I like to get together with fellow activists, go on demos and protest marches, that kind of thing. It really varies. To be honest, thinking about it now it's a huge question isn't it? I mean, what do any of us really want? Do we even know? I suppose it depends on if you mean personally, or in a bigger abstract sense of "what do I want for the world?" I mean, there are the immediate short term wants (like whiskey, dope, food, sex) and then there are the long term more forward thinking wants that are quite abstract really....

Eti: Such as?

Aman: Well, for one thing I always wanted to know more about you guys, and to establish a dialogue between us, but then that ties in with my always wanting to understand the deep mysteries of life like what is God? What happens when we die? What are ghosts, poltergeists etc? You know what I mean? It's like I've always felt and experienced this "other" side of life and reality going on but never really had any clue what any of it means. Then there is the desire for a fairer world, for all the killing and cruelty to stop. That's a big one. When it comes to the Earth too then obviously, as an environmental campaigner, I want to see a radical change in humanities relationship with our world and it's non-human populations...the list could go on all day really but it comes down to being at peace I suppose. That'd be it. I want to be able to live at peace, with myself and with the world at large I guess, and with you guys of course! I mean, nobody in their right mind would actually want to be at war with anyone right? At least I hope not anyway!

Eti: Well, there is much I could say about that. From what we have observed about your species it would seem there are some who do enjoy the process and seem determined to expand warfare and violent conflict outwards into the far reaches of your Galaxy, but no, on the whole Earth people caught up in the sharp end of war do not seem to enjoy it. They suffer, most horribly. But getting back to what you list there, that's some pretty big stuff. You mentioned earlier about wanting "to better your self and contribute to a better world". I'm curious to know what you believe you are doing to realise that aim? How does an Earthling go about bettering themselves?

Aman: Gosh, that is a good question. I suppose learning is one key aspect of it, always being willing to learn and grow in our understanding of ourselves and of reality. Being willing to look at myself has always been key really, I mean for example since I first interacted with you guys I've been on this really strange journey of self discovery. It's not always pleasant. Sometimes the price of self knowledge can be so high I guess I find myself wondering if it's worth it! But it is important I think that we do not shy away from looking inward and facing what is there, good and bad, as difficult as that might be at times. I mean we are all hypocrites right? On some level at least. We want a fairer world but are we fair people? Not always no. we want a world where cruelty doesn't happen but are we never cruel? No, we can be ruthlessly cruel sometimes, when it suits us to be or when our emotions drive us beyond reason I suppose. For myself I know I have lived a somewhat ignoble life and done some pretty horrible things over the years, so I try not to judge others too harshly you know? Because at the end of the day we are none of us perfect are we?

Eti: That is philosophically debatable from my perspective, but I get your point. You have mentioned this thing called "whiskey" a few times now. It seems to be high on your list of "short term desires". As I understand it this is a very addictive and somewhat self destructive intoxicant. Do you consume a lot of "whiskey"?

Aman: No, not really. I used to be a big drinker back in the day, but it caused me to become very destructive and hurtful in my actions towards others. I had to reign it in when I realised, same with other intoxicants that I used to do. These days I may very occasionally enjoy a glass or two, even a bottle with a friend now and then but to be honest I cannot afford it. It is expensive stuff and too much makes me very sick so I don't tend to bother much these days.

Eti: I see. Getting back to your desire to "contribute to a better world". So how do you feel you are doing that?

Aman: Hmmm....Well I try to be nice these days, you know think about what other people may be feeling and how my actions or words may affect them. I don't always get it right though. I am a bit narcissistic and so it can be challenging to empathise, you know? But I've learnt from past mistakes that my feelings are not the only ones that matter, so I try to live accordingly and tread gently so to speak. I try to consume less than I used to and since we first hooked up I've stopped eating the flesh of sentient creatures altogether as that just strikes me as barbaric really. I mean, if my survival depended on it then ok, maybe I could hunt and kill, butcher and cook and eat say a fish, or a rabbit, or even a deer. But my survival in my cultural environment doesn't depend on it does it? And with the data coming out now, and the information at our fingertips about how much collective harm we are doing by supporting the meat industry, well it just seems stupid to me not to embrace some degree of change in our relationship with food. I try to be conscious of the energy I am wasting too, you know electricity, gas, diesel that kind of thing, because the fossil fuel economy is really messing this world up and has to stop. Anyone with kids today ought to be concerned about this really because if we don't stop it, those kids may not actually have a future, at all! My efforts at activism have been sporadic and concern a broad spectrum of activities. I try to help people when I can in whatever way I can, sometimes it just means turning up and being there, sometimes it means putting yourself in harms way to prevent a greater harm from occurring. It seems increasingly obvious that we live in a world where most of us are manipulated and exploited at every turn, and the massively wealthy benefit from the suffering of the massively poor. This has to change I feel. We cannot just go on chasing bits of paper around and kidding ourselves that the problems of the world are not our problem. I mean, we all contribute to them one way or another right? Nobody exists in a bubble, so we need to sit up and take notice I feel. I mean when we have such a wealth of information now at our fingertips, like whats happening between our species and yours for instance! That's got to change surely, for everyone's benefit. Surely peace is better than war right? Sorry, I think I'm repeating myself now! Ha!

Eti: That's ok Aman. I think I'm getting a clear picture now of just how perplexing, utterly confused and paradoxical you are. You mentioned earlier about discussing our species with friends, in particular discussing if we are "good" or "evil". Can you explain what you mean by this and can you describe how you view yourselves in this context? Are humans "good" or "evil"?

Aman: Oh jeez.....I suppose it depends who you ask really. Us Earthlings are very hung up on polarities and absolutes. We like to put things is descriptive boxes that help us avoid having to think too deeply about them. I mean, nobody really wants to think of "evil" as something within themselves, we tend to externalise it. "They" are the evil while "we" are the good. It simplifies things for us to think in this way I suppose and nobody really wants to be evil unless there is some pathology going on in them. One thing I have observed about people from Earth is we are fully capable of being both, and often fluctuate between one end of the spectrum to the other. Sometimes we do right things for wrong reasons, or wrong things for right reasons.Sometimes we are engaged in what we would call evil without even realising it ourselves! When it comes to the subject of ET's we tend to think in absolute terms and can be very anthropocentric in our thinking. So it depends on how we perceive your existence impacting on our own. It is puzzling for sure, I mean look at the whole "alien abduction" thing for an example. People think of it as way out of order for your folk to take one of us out of our environment and interfere with our memories and such, and condemn you for it, but do not equate human behaviour towards other species in the same light. If it turned out that Earth was a farm and we are just food for some other predatory species we would be horrified, and yet at the same time think it totally acceptable and normal for us to treat animals on Earth this way. I guess it comes down to our ability to empathise really. We are not very good at that on the whole. Our own emotional reality is vitally important to us but we do not really think very much about the emotional reality for other species, in fact we tend to assume they don't have one or if they do it doesn't really matter all that much. We tend to think we are more important than other species, including yours. As for me, personally speaking, I've done some downright cruel things in my life, I've lied to, stolen from and hurt people, but then I've also done some very kind and selfless things too. Am I "good" or "evil"? well, like I say, it kind of totally depends on who you ask really.

Eti: But what do you think? About your own nature, and that of your species?

Aman: On balance I think if I had to choose one or the other I would lean towards a negative interpretation of myself and my species as we are very myopic and think in terms of short term goals and selfish desires. We justify all kinds of things that cause suffering and we tend to disassociate from the suffering of others, especially if alleviating it means making some kind of personal sacrifice. The whole war thing is a great example of that, how we can so easily be convinced to view murder as justifiable and see other people as not worthy of empathy. I mean just look at Yemen right? Or the whole Islamophobic thing. And yet the same people who do these terrible things, murder people with bombs and guns, launch drones against civilians, chop off peoples heads and film it for fun....it is monstrous and yet, are these people really any different from any of us? Do they not have the capacity to care about folk, be kind and generous? Of course they do, they are human. It is like you say, a paradox. People are a mixture and I don't think the terms really have any meaning except in our own heads, you know?

Eti: Indeed. Earlier you mentioned this thing called "sex". You seemed embarrassed by the word. Could you explain why that is?

Aman: Oh well...hmmm.....well, it's deeply personal I suppose and we tend to be quite shy and mixed up about it on the whole....there is a lot of judgement around the whole subject and a lot of confusion too. It affects us emotionally and well, it's just difficult to talk about really....I suppose it's a repression thing or cultural thing, I don't know but...errm...I think we need to save that subject for when we know each other better really.....uummmm.....is that okay?

Eti: That's fine, I don't want to make you uncomfortable. Well we have come to the end of our time today but to sum things up from what you are saying it would seem you and your world are in a bit of a state really. You want peace but are not at peace with yourselves or each other. You want freedom but are in a state of slavery of mind and belief. You want to intoxicate yourselves fully knowing that it tends to be harmful to do so. You want a fair world but acknowledge that you yourself are unfair. You externalise evil and condemn it whilst justifying it within yourself. You want to be alone, yet also want the company of others. You enjoy mystery whilst wanting it to be explained.You tend to judge the actions of others whilst justifying similar actions in your own life and you think in polarized and absolute terms whilst acknowledging that those terms in and of themselves have no meaning.....the most powerful impulse of desire in your species is the desire for sex and yet it is the one thing you seem uncomfortable talking about and indeed seem to be ashamed of it in some way! It is almost as if somewhere along the line of your species development and evolution you have become convinced that your own existence is something to be ashamed of, and you are suffering some kind of collective trauma as a result of it.

....So there you have it, one confused and confusing Earthling for sure. Be sure to tune in next time when we ask the Earthling two more probing questions namely, what are you doing here? And, why don't you help us?







Tuesday 15 January 2019

Problem: We are facing ecological catastrophe and the disintegration of social cohesion.




The Solution is: Stop the burning of fossil fuels worldwide.
(What can be done locally)



  • Energy is a requirement of life. Nothing can be actualised without it.
  • To recreate community resilience we need energy independence.
  • To allow for true democratic autonomy we need energy independence.
  • To remove corruption from governance we need energy independence.
  • Renewable energy technology has the advantage of being capable of allowing for decentralised energy generation.
  • “The grid” is obsolete. It makes us vulnerable to controlling influences.
  • The economic power of the fossil fuel industry has corrupted the political sphere to point where it is no longer fit for purpose or in any way representative of the people it purports to serve.
  • We have an obligation to create community resilience in the face of the inevitable.
  • What is inevitable? Ice cap melt – sea level rise – mass migration – global mean surface temperature rise – localised and international disintegration of social cohesion – resource competition – food shortages – infrastructure failures – attempts at domination by resource based monopolies (food, water, gas, oil, medicines, weapons)
  • How do we prepare for these current realities and future inevitabilities?

  1. Initiate a new localised energy infrastructure based on renewable energy generation, decoupled from “the grid” and managed on a “not for profit” basis.
  2. Encourage and support (i.e. provide funding and resources for) research and development into new energy technologies, whilst providing security for those researchers involved in the process and creating an open source system of monitoring and supervision that prevents anything connected to the process from happening in secret. This also must happen on a “not for profit” basis.
  3. Roll out an educational initiative aimed at reaching every level of the community with regard to our relationship with energy in terms of transportation, entertainment, warmth and light, food choices and consumption habits.
  4. Ensure that as part of this initiative education about food dependency and food creation is included and encourage people to make the transition from perceiving money as more valuable than food to perceiving food as more valuable than money.
  5. Create an accessible means for every household to participate and benefit from localised food production. Free up urban green spaces for this purpose and employ experienced and informed individuals and organisations to manage, maintain and supervise these spaces.
  6. Increase efforts to reduce and eliminate food waste from the commercial sector by the creation of food surplus management teams who will work in partnership with all local growers, wholesalers and retailers to intercept food surpluses at the point of disposal and redistribute to the community on a “free at the point of need” basis. Organic surpluses that cannot be consumed by humans can be consumed by animals. Organic waste that cannot be consumed by animals can be composted and thereby provide “fuel” for localised food growing initiatives. The potential for energy generation from organic waste also exists and a large scale “hot box” composting initiative could be considered that draws heat from the process. This heat energy could then be used to either generate electricity or piped directly into public access buildings and institutions (universities, hospitals, schools, hostels, court houses, police stations, community centres etc etc)
  7. Identify and allocate land for afforestation within the city and county, implementing a large scale carbon sequestration program that must consider the options for dynamic carbon dioxide removal systems – e.g. Forest creation and management for long term sequestration and bio-diversity. The use of bamboo as both a short term carbon sequester and a resource to replace plastic for end use disposable or short life-time products, the reintroduction of hemp as a resource for nutrition, carbon sequestration, medicinal by products, textile manufacturing and industrial scale construction.
  8. The afforestation and localised food production initiatives could be integrated with the right input from expertise from the fields of permaculture and low impact agriculture. Forest farms could be created with a focus less on financial profitability and more on the value of the produce to the community. “Not for profit” models must be explored in all of these contexts.
  9. A culture of community inclusion and responsibility can be created within a relatively short time frame with the right educational initiatives and the appropriate funding.
  10. Declare a climate emergency: This is an essential first step towards implementing such initiatives. The declaration needs to be clear, understandable, unequivocal and science based. The true nature of the threat posed to our communities by the ecological collapse of Earth systems, and the political dependence on external actors within the national and international contexts, need to be understood in accessible terms. The existential threat from both environmental changes to the bio-sphere and political instability within a global context is real, current and increasing exponentially. This needs to be understood by all stakeholders within the community.
  11. The creation of “Peoples Assemblies” and “Community Moots” is the vehicle for inclusion and participation with this process and needs to be made attractive and incentivised rather than enforced. People from all and every walk of life must have an accessible means of participation with these decision making bodies. The power of policy making authority needs to be shared among the people, rather than coalesced around a few individuals. Provision must be provided to offer inclusion and participation to even the hardest to reach sectors of the community (e.g. the socially excluded – homeless and rough sleepers, elderly and alone, house bound, prisoners and convicts, those in residential care, asylum seekers and refugees, people in hospital, the armed forces etc etc)
  12. Industry & transport. There needs to be radical shift away from fossil fuels in both of these sectors.
  13. Integrated solutions for industry need to be introduced that provide businesses the opportunity to maintain their productivity, save money and power themselves more responsibly. Polluters must be regulated and if necessary penalised, whilst preventing them from passing incurred costs from such punitive measures onto the consumer of their services or products. Pollution must become unprofitable and the means to continue in business in less, or non, polluting ways must be made accessible to them. Solutions present themselves when we consider the application of localised energy infrastructure on a “not for profit” basis - or when we encourage, and if necessary subsidise, the switch for businesses to become free from “the grid” by implementing their own energy generation facilities and resources. The key here is energy independence on as localised a level as possible. Wherever the potential exists for any commercial entity to meet it's own energy requirements at the point of need then expertise and resources need to be invested to enable them to do so at minimal cost to themselves. Such investment will pay off in incalculable terms in the context of creating a culture of community resilience and energy awareness. Planning regulations need to be reassessed and relaxed for any localised renewable energy initiative.
  14. Public transport should be publicly owned and also managed on a “not for profit” basis. As we attempt to discourage wasteful and polluting fossil fuel based transport methods we need to offer viable alternatives that are accessible to all sectors of the community. The re-introduction of city trams systems needs to be considered. The viability of implementation of hydrogen powered public transport needs to be assessed. A public bicycle scheme that gives free access at the point of need (such as in place in the city of London) needs to be considered. School transportation schemes that involve parents and education workers that reduce the use of cars at peak times need to be developed. An exclusion zone within city limits for all unnecessary fossil fuel vehicles needs to be considered.
  15. A policy of divestment of any direct or indirect investment in fossil fuel industries and arms industries is essential. The geo-political and ethical implications of these entwined industries cannot be overstated. The ecological, political, socio-economic impact on the life of this planet from these profit engines has always been, and continues to be, destructive, corrupting and coercive. Any policy decision makers have a duty of care over the lives their decisions impact upon. This cannot be dismissed in the context of financial investment without which these ecocidal  and homicidal industries could not sustain their business models. The transition towards a global culture that values and respects life, abhors war and protects diversity of life and culture necessitates a radical shift in attitudes. 
  16. Nuclear power, along with any new fossil fuel infrastructure or extraction, must not even be considered in the context of responsible stewardship of the Earth. These practices are not safe, sustainable or acceptable.

Tuesday 2 January 2018

The simple truth

I am sorry.

I was wrong.

You deserved better.

Please forgive me if you can.

I am grateful.

This is right.

Life is a gift.

I forgive you completely, whoever you are, whatever you have done.



Let's move forward from here in a way that benefits everyone.


Happy 2018 and remember, the truth is not what you think or are told. Ever.



Love, Courage and Strength to you all.

A

Sunday 12 March 2017

A Wart.

Struggling to Breathe

You see me calm, implacable, certain always

Ready to join in and assist.

You see me convinced, defiant in the face of cruelty

I will always resist.

You see me with experience that shapes what I believe, but....

What you do not see is

I am struggling to breathe.



Monday 6 March 2017

I Want To Love You. (Work in progress)

I want to Love You.


I don't need your approval, praise or your applause,

I don't need to be a hero fighting for your cause,

I don't need for you to think I'm better than the rest,

I don't need to be the project in which you will invest,

I just want to love you.


I do not want to own you,

Nor need to know your "mine"

I don't need you to agree with me on concepts of Divine,

I want to love you freely as you yourself are free

To throw back your head and laugh with joy....

...with or without me!


I want to show you all the wonder as we explore the mystery

Of this Universe that doesn't need a damn thing from you or me.

I want to love you,

Without desire or need,

Without that selfish hunger of the egos greed,

Without care or concern about the time we spend,

Held in other peoples arms,

Momentary mesmerised by other peoples charms,

I want to love you with out end....


...and if the seas should boil or the skies fall on our head,

I want to love you while I'm living,

I want to love you when I'm dead.

I want to care about your feelings without the need to make them mine,

I want to love you through the darkness, love you as you shine,

I want to show you every ounce of joy my being has to give,

As I watch you love your life, watch you as you live...


...and if you think I write these lines as Romeo to Juliet

I want to make it clear to you that I cannot accept,

That you are not her, or him, or them, or That....or me,

Because I want to love this world of souls until we All are free!

And what I choose to give to any one of time, effort or attention,

I give because I choose to give without exception or reservation,

Because I want us ALL to live,

With this passion and this joy,

With all of these reasons why life should be enjoyed.

I do NOT want to need you,

Or be the one thing that you need,

I don't want to enslave you I want to see you freed,

Freed from the pain of feeling you're alone,

Like all your chances of a joyous life

Like starlings have all flown.....


....I want to love you! And you, and you and you and You!

Without fear or lies or jealousy,

With you or yours or mine or me,

I want to love you until you're free but.....


.....but I cannot be your happiness or your reason to survive,

Or the answer to your questions, or what makes you feel alive,

Im not this image you've created nor this solution that you see, no...

I'm just "Me".

And I want to love you in truth,

Not urgently or desperately,

But love you without falsehood,

Love you honestly.

And honestly?

I can't stand it when you try to own me,

For I was born to be so free,

And as you try to chain me down

You become my enemy,

But if we share this vision you will understand and see

In time....

This love is more.

More than instinctual drives of biology,

More than appreciation of anatomy,

More than hormonal feelings,

More than chemistry....


That this is an honest love for all humanity,

More than our instincts need for acceptance or comfort

could ever be.


I want to love you.

Even if I choose to leave you be

To make your choices, find your path,

Because I love you,

I want you to be free.





I

Wednesday 8 February 2017

Ramblings of a well intentioned fool.....

Hey folks!

So I'm thinking about some deep stuff this morning and my ramblings may be a bit disjointed, but I want to get my thoughts out there before they fade into another day of routine and prosaic activities.

Forgive me please if what I am about to say is in any way upsetting, or lacks the kind of polished cohesion you prefer from the stuff you devote your time to reading.

So here at the Leicester Peace and Love Collective we experience all kinds of conflict. Personality clashes abound in a house full of strong willed and dynamic people with busy lives and different priorities. We are, for the most part, a happy bunch of folk who have become genuine friends over the time we have spent together, but it is not always smiles and hugs and hippie ideals being realised. Often it is squabbbles over who has or has not washed the dishes, who has moved somebodies laundry, who hasn't put the hoover back in the office, who has paid what and who hasnt, whose turn it is to do this job or that chore and why hasn't it been done and oh for fucks sake why can't you just clean up your shit! We are all lovely folk who live here but we are not saints, or anything special. We are just people, and sometimes peoples needs, expectations and desires clash, and there is conflict.

How we go about resolving that conflict is the mark of how strong and cohesive we are as a community, as well as a mark of how mature and evolved we are as individuals.

Some of us are more passive than others. Some of us are more direct. Some of us are more confrontational. We can all, at times, be very judgmental of each other.

Yet the key to a successful and forward thinking community lies in the strength of it's relationships and that means our ability to appreciate each other, and respect each other.

I often feel that I get off very light and receive far more respect and appreciation that I probably deserve when I weigh up all the factors of my role and place here.

So friendship then is the key. Honest, emotionally involved, and appreciative relationships.

I posted recently (when feeling a little down with one thing and another) about the concept of tribe and within that post I made some comments about the failure of the family unit within western culture.

Please do not misunderstand me and think that I am dismissive of the importance of family. Although it is true that my own relationship with my blood family is somewhat disfunctional, yet I love them and am grateful to them for the start in life that they gave me, and I know that they also have great love for me in spite of the difficulties we have faced in communicating with, and appreciating, each other over the years.

I met this wonderful man last year in a muddy field, living in a tent, who had made the arduous journey all the way from war torn Syria. This man changed my life and shall always retain a very special place in my heart.

He asked me a question one day before I left for the UK, using the privilege of my passport and British citizenship to escape the mud drenched and fearful uncertainty his life had become. He asked me why it is in our culture that people do not look after their elders. How it is that we feel justified to abandon their care in their old age to strangers, employees of private companies or the state on minimum wage. From his perspective our attitude and relationship with the concept and reality of family was indicative of a profound moral bankruptcy within our culture, and I feel he was absolutely right to say so. His words struck deep into the core of my heart and have settled there very uncomfortably as I continued on my way in life, building community, building relationships and failing miserably to maintain any meaningful connection with the very people to whom I owe my existence.

I am working on it now, and have resolved to make far more effort in this regard, but it has given me much to think about as to why and how this decline of the significance of the family unit has developed within our culture, and if his cultural attitude to family, tribe and people is in fact more or less enlightened.

When I, and everyone of my generation and the one that preceded it, were growing up we had a terrible doom hanging over our heads. We lived in constant fear of the sudden reality breaking out of nuclear armageddon. We were shown films in school, as children, as to what we should do if and when the infamous "three minute warning" should sound. It was absurd, especially where I grew up which was so rural that I doubt very much that we would have heard any such warning in the first place, and the instructions were equally absurd. In the face of nuclear war we were in effect told to hide under the table, or in a cupboard under the stairs and not go out until it was declared safe to do so. Great. Nothing like being prepared for the worst eh?

I remember in 1989 when the Berlin wall that divided the two super powers came down, and the collective sigh of relief was tangible. Everyone had been holding their breath, some of us for the extent of our short lives, and some for the forty years since the end of world war two.

The spectre of global extermination was no more, and now it was time to party. Some of us, myself included, partied hard and long.

But we failed to grasp the true nature of our existential threat, and we failed to realise that it had not passed at all. The true nature of that threat was our moral decline as a culture and our unwillingness to address the very real and very visceral results world wide of that decline. Deep in the core of ourselves we all saw the writing on the wall. We all watched Bob Geldof swear on national TV "just give us your fucking money!" as images of starving children filled our screen and rent our hearts. We all learned in our science classes the very real and very fact based folly of the environmental destruction we, as a species, were inflicting on our world.

We watched our political leaders become corrupted plutocrats, actors, liars and thieves. We watched the military become the rogue and unaccountable bully of the global school yard and we watched the law enforcement and intelligence community become gangsters and drug smugglers on a global scale.

And still the children starved, the jungles became deserts, the seas became ever more poisonous and bereft of life and we clung on to the hope that this time, this election, this man or this woman would turn out to be honest, and live up to the promises of making things right again.

For some of us, like myself and many of my peers, it was all too much and after trying naively and immaturely to shout at the world, warning it of it's imminent danger, we too took the stance of the ostrich and I for one buried my head deep in the sand of hedonism and the comfortable emotional oblivion of heroin.

I woke up from that heroin trance in 2012 and what I woke up to was inspiring. People were realising the danger. People were catching onto a new way and model for living. People were focusing on solutions, rather than problems. A cultural and spiritual revival and re-awakening was going on and I happily jumped on board.


I know it is a cliche to say the "the children are the future", but it is no less true for that, and it is for the children of today that I strive for a better tomorrow.

The times I have spent in the refugee camps of northern France have given me much to consider with regard the future we are now building.

The conditions are being set for a whole generation of traumatised and disillusioned children to become traumatised and disillusioned adults with no reason to have anything but contempt for the institutions and peoples of the western world. They have been bombed out of their homes and lives, forced to flee the imposed wastelands of their homes, driven by need onto the shores of our glorious fortress continent that purports to stand proud in the defense of freedom, dignity and respect for all life.

And yet, the response of these self appointed defenders of freedom is to let freedom drown in the ocean, while fencing themselves in and handing over their essential liberties to the same warlords and gangsters we have watched lie and cheat and manipulate the people all of our lives.

So we have come full circle and now we face the consequences of the true threat to our existence within the infinite mystery of time and space that we always faced. Moral decline. Yours, mine, ours, everyones.

I am privileged to know a few very young people, one of whom lives here among us in this community. When I look at her, as when I gazed in sadness at the children in Dunkirk, I cannot help but wonder what her future reality will be, and I cannot help but accept a moral obligation to give her, and her peers both near and far, the best chance for happiness and meaningful joyous life that I can.

For me this has taken the form of trying to build community again. Attempting, some may think naively, to help formulate and create a wider sense of family and a deeper connection of relationship with the "others" around me. I want for her, and for all the kids of today, a way and means of weathering the coming storm. I want to give them the tools to explore the best of all the cultures now being forced together by the injustices and inhumanities of those institutional forces of war, law, and so-called intelligence.

I want to help build something real that they can hold onto and believe in as the future becomes their now.

I have been inspired by a wider vision. A realisation that we are indeed not alone in this universe and that there are watchers among us, eager to see us mature and to welcome us into their sense of community.

However, there will always be conflict among us people. As we seek to balance the imperatives of different needs, different priorities, different ways of relating to and understanding what life and reality actually are and what it means to be a living, thinking, feeling thing within it.

I have come to the conclusion that the death of ego is the pre-requisite for effective community to flourish and true bonds of genuine friendship, appreciation and respect to be formed. For here in our western world we have pursued the ideal of individualism to the point where we no longer seem to notice the significance or sacred nature of the "Other" at all, be that "Other" in the form of the animals we enslave and torture for our convenience, the people we demonize and condemn to hell for our own sense of saftey or the world we live within and depend upon that we inflict ever greater levels of suffering upon in the deluded notion that it is our right and our freedom that we are defending, often in the "name of God".

And we destroy ourselves. And we do well to remember that to everyone else we are the "Other" too. How we relate to the other is ultimately exactly how the other shall relate to us.

Love Courage and Strength to you all.

Monday 6 February 2017

Re-realisations and reflections on the nature of self

Hi.

So as you have probably gathered from my last few posts the trip to Dunkirk had a very profound effect on me this time.

I think it is fair to say that it is impossible to do any kind of work in the humanitarian context without it having a profound effect on you unless your heart is made of stone, and if it was you most probably wouldn't be doing it in the first place.

Since getting home to this lovely, beautiful community of artists, anarchists, activists and rebels we call the Leicester Peace and Love Collective I have had time and opportunity to reflect deeply on life, both in the personal and abstract sense of the word, and I have re-realised a simple truth that I had lost sight of about my nature and my being.

All of my recent mental, emotional and physical angst is primarily down to one thing.

Distance.

The distance I have allowed to develop between me and people in my life who I love and care about.

The distance I have allowed to develop between my internal and external selves.

The simple fact that I have allowed my ego - i.e. my sense of being, my personality, emotions, desires and sense of self importance - to become more real to me and more important than the "Other".

This "Other" that I mention comes in many forms from abstract symbols, personifications and archetypes of the Divine Principle or Prime Mind (There are so many, you pick one, Jesus, Allah, Shiva, Kali, Krishna, Odin, Thor, Morrigan,...the list is endless!). Through every expression and manifestation of consciousness and awareness that has over the years manifested itself to me on some level, be it extra-terrestrial, angelic/demonic, human or animal.To every source and repository of life like our Earth for example, and eventually all the way down to the smallest knowable particles of manifest things like atoms, electrons etc.

Clearly we cannot in this life have a personal connected relationship with reality on all of these levels (unless you consider your self in a permanent state of Oneness and Full Attainment, which I don't!). However we can relate to the other in so many forms, most of them as people in our lives, people we meet, get to know, are born connected to or hear about from far away places.

When I go through the kind of emotional difficulties I have been going through my default response is to insist upon distance from others, and for sure I am of a personality type that craves and needs solitude from time to time. Solitude gives me time to reflect, time to train my mind, clearing it of thoughts and learning to observe objectively the emotional states within my being. I am also someone who benefits from time alone in natural environments, and I think we all do. Time to feel a part of the natural world, to observe it, appreciate it's beauty and it's cruelty, and learn from the actions of it's systems.

However there comes a point when solitude becomes an indulgence that creates an unhealthy distance from the "Other", and it is not really distance from others that I need or crave. In fact it is the opposite. It is greater closeness that I need. Better connection with everyone and everything around me. To achieve that closeness and have those connections requires emotional and intellectual honesty, with myself and with others. The times I take in solitude allows me to connect with and identify my own feelings, so that I am then able to be honest about them. Rather than be an indulgent or defensive  means of distancing myself it should be an opportunity to learn genuine closeness with my feelings, thoughts, desires, fears, hopes and sense of relationship with the wider objective reality of which "I" am but one point in the quantum fields of time, space, eternity and infinity.

I have recently allowed my ego to get carried away with itself, caught up in its own sense of self importance, and as a result I have failed very often to form the kind of genuine emotional, intellectual, spiritual and physical intimate relationships with "Other" that my being, like every sentient be-ing, longs for.

I have become distant from the true nature of my own thoughts and my own feelings.

I have become distant from the people in my life, near or far, that I care about and love, and who care about and love me.

And I have become distant from the realisations of the unmanifest, or partially manifest "Others" that have brought me to this place, position and opportunity in life.

It is time for me to start closing these gaps, and once again bringing my internal and external realities closer together, until hopefully one fine day they become truly and inseparably one.

For any community to be successful and sustainable requires genuine honest relationships between it's members, and for me to be an effective member of any community means I need to fully embrace my own state of be-ing - without pretenses, defenses or the egos tendency to project itself onto reality and onto others.

It is challenging, and at times an uncomfortable journey, but I am looking forward to it.

Love, Courage and Strength to you all.





Saturday 4 February 2017

The inevitable toxicity of tribalism and the responsibility of the individual

Hi everyone.

So I've had a few more thoughts after posting my last post about the nature of tribe and the self justification it gives us to hate on the "other".

I see tribalism in all areas of our lives. Religious tribalism, racial tribalism, cultural, social and political tribalism. All of these group identities are being used against us all as tools for division and vehicles for hate.

If we in the west don't wise up to it soon then we also will be sucked headlong into the ongoing conflict that threatens to engulf our entire world in flames.

I see people on facebook who have been friends for a long time falling out and condemning each other because of differences of opinion or perspective without any recourse to consideration or contemplation on the other point of view.

I see the "hard left" hating the "alt right" and the "hard right" hating everyone else, the climate change deniers hating the eco-warriors and the greens hating the deniers and everyone hating on the chem trails protesters.

We have Corbyn supporters hating the tories while conservative and labour mps all rally together to hate on Corbyn.

Those who voted "remain" hating those who voted "brexit" and vice versa.

The rich hate the poor while the poor hate the rich.

And Donald Trump just seems to hate everyone while glorying in his role as everyones favoutite figure of hate.


This is all so absurd, and essentially no more reasonable or enlightened than Muslims hating Christians or Christians hating Jews. It's the same dynamic but without "god" being the cause for self justification, just a strong sense of "being right" and those who disagree with us "being wrong".

I am reminded of a poem by William Blake:

"O for a voice like thunder, and a tongue
 To Drown the throat of war! When the senses
 Are shaken, and the soul is driven to madness,
 Who can stand? When the souls of the oppressed
 Fight in the troubled air that rages, who can stand?
 When the whirlwind of fury comes from the
 Throne of God, when the frowns of his countenance
 Drive the nations together, who can stand?
 When Sin claps his broad wings over the battle,
 And sails rejoicing in the flood of death;
 When souls are torn to everlasting fire,
 And fiends of hell rejoice upon the slain,
 O who can stand?
 O who hath caused this?
 O who can answer at the throne of God?
 The kings and nobles of the land have done it!
 Hear it not, Heaven, thy ministers have done it!"

For this is indeed the truth we face, being manipulated and maneuvered into the madness and horror of war against our brothers and sisters in this world, and others, by those who assume a privileged place of safety from which to conduct their mind games of control, and seek to ever quench their unquenchable thirst for yet greater levels of domination, control and power.

Typical bloody addicts!

So then this concept of tribe, and tribalism has resulted in the reality of the nation state. And the nation state has been the engine and vehicles of all of the horrors of abuse, conflict and exploitation that we have seen in our world over the last few thousand years. From this sense of belonging to a national tribe has come the ever encroaching, ever striving, ever fighting force of imperialism. The idea that one tribe is superior over all others and can demonstrate it's superiority through violence. This is the essence of Empire and is the ideology behind Fascism and the concept of "manifest destiny", and it is the face of pure evil.

There are no chosen people. There are just people. To think otherwise is to be mistaken.

These forces are not alien, they are human constructs. The impulses that conceive and drive them are human impulses. If we are looking for the true enemy, the true villain of this drama, then we need only to look in the mirror for it is all there to be seen in our own being.

These forces use religious concepts and symbols of divine endorsement as justification for their crimes against life Itself, either in an open vocal manner or in an occluded secretive manner, but make no mistake - religious concepts and the sense of self righteousness they endow upon us are at the heart and root of all that is horrific, cruel and destructive in this world.

It is always so with people.

We excuse ourselves of our crimes, our moral compromises, our deceptions and our inconsistencies while at the same time condemning others for having the same faults of character.

We construct notions and ideologies that place our selves in the front line and centre of the "heroic crusade", and by virtue of that constructed reality and self appointed role we develop and nurture a sense of entitlement that allows "me" to break every rule or code, even my own, as the ends justify the means.

Some are addicted to power, some are addicted to a sense of self righteous indignation, but both are addicts and both addictions are destructive forces that drive us all to the brink of madness.

With regard to the current so-called "refugee crisis" (which as any intelligent person knows is really simply a consequence of the moral crisis of global inequality that has existed for a very long time); in the face of the magnitude of this tragedy of our times, in the face of the horror of a world where bodies young and old wash up on beaches like so much flotsam only to be ignored by tourists and argued about by politicians, in a world where people are so driven by desperation, conflict and inequality that they would risk themselves and their children to the meaningless and undignified fate of becoming human garbage washed up on a foreign shore, I have felt sure and justified that it matters no more what happens to me on a personal level, or what personal choices I make or methods I choose so long as I am responding to that situation, to that horrific reality.

And yet now I feel unsure again.

As I realise how far and how deep I have fallen from my own highest ideals, how corrupted I have allowed myself to become for the sake of expediency and how distant and irrelevant the most meaningful epiphanies of my life have become to me, I wonder have I too fallen foul of the egos trap of placing itself front and centre of the heroic crusade and allowing itself the entitlement of whatever is required of it to maintain that role?

How do I move forward from here?

How do I best serve the cause of Life from this point on?

How do I now go about regaining mastery over, and respect for, myself?

How do I continue the quest for meaning in the face of all these monstrous absurdities?

"The kings and nobles of the land have done it!" - for sure this is a truth. However, as I wrestle here with the physical and existential pain of my own being I know a harsher truth, a truth I do not wish to face.

I have done to my own physical being what humanity has done to the world it exists within.

I have reveled at my own destruction in the name of pleasure and sensation. I have laughed at or dismissed every warning sign that things may not be altogether ok with me.

For the sake of my addictions I have failed, quite goriously, to act on the truths and revelations that life has presented to me.

I wonder if for myself, and for humanity as a whole, the situation is ever hopeless.

If we act now, will it be enough?

Or a case of too little, too late?

Love, Courage and Strength to you all.

Is the situation ever hopeless?

I seem to have properly fucked myself up again. I went to Dunkirk Human Being Camp to help the rebuild crew for the women's centre. It was truly an honour to meet and work with all of those men and women, as well as the long term volunteers working valiantly and relentlessly on shelter maintenance. I shan't bore my readers with a list of strangers names, they know who they are and I love each and every one of them. The teams of volunteers at L'Auberge des Migrants warehouse as committed as ever have my total admiration for the work they have done and are continuing to do. Truly these are the unsung heroes of our age in the struggle against the rise of Fascism in Europe. An army of peaceful warriors and compassionate souls whose devotion to the cause of protecting the lives, rights and well being of people from distant lands who have nothing to offer them in return except friendship is an example to us all of humanity at its best. Yes, there are casualties, and although my involvement in  life at Dunkirk Human Being Camp has been minimal compared to most I think it is fair to say I am temporarily out of action on any level. Not quite two weeks of hard graft has left me a bit of a wreck, physically and emotionally. But that's my own fault. I drank heavily while I was there, smoked almost constantly and relied on strong painkillers to get me out and mobile each day. Altogether a stupid set of coping mechanisms indicative of my having failed to learn or apply my life's lessons in such circumstances.

Coming home to the Leicester Peace and Love Collective has been bittersweet and it seems evident that I need to reflect on my role and my future in such a communal setting. Am I truly evolved or mature enough to live effectively in a community? It is very clear to me that I could manage and overcome my addictions far easier when I lived alone and that my spiritual aspirations where easier to reach for and practice towards also, although to be fair, I was being looked after by the welfare state back then which goes a long way towards removing other life pressures from ones shoulders.

And yet I love this community of souls that live here, and I see very clearly how what we have is a microcosm of what needs to exist in the world.

A community of unity through diversity. A people united by bonds of affection and genuine emotional engagement with each others well being. Not joined together by any common goal, common belief structure, shared political viewpoint or world view, but strong because of the personal bonds of sincere affection and respect we have for each other.

I could write much more about life on the camp at Dunkirk, and I will at some point. Even though some may feel I've said too much already and yet observe, reflect and write is what I do best. However coming home to the kind of conflicts, misunderstandings, power struggles and relationship dynamics I've come home too has caused me to realise the greatest tragedy and greatest hope the camp at Dunkirk has to offer us all. The saddest thing to me is the peoples inability to put aside their racial and cultural differences and learn to recognise each other as brothers and sisters on the same journey. Some have and do, many in fact, but not all and as is usually the case in human affairs a tiny bit of hate can undo the work of a lot of love.

Then there are the power games, the struggle for control. Games being played out by organised gangs, French police and the government's of both France & the UK.

It saddens me to see this constant manipulation game being played with people by people and I see it both there and here all of the time. People manipulate others into a position of disempowered dependence just to get what they want from them, playing folk off against folk, spreading lies and rumours and treating each other as either opportunities for gain (be that gain influential, financial or sexual), or threats to their sense of dominance that must be eliminated.

Someone asked me recently what the concept of "tribe" means to me. Well I will tell you that I think it is a curse and plague on humanity. It is a reflection of the constant need of the insecure and disconnected self to achieve a sense of belonging through the exclusion of those who "don't belong". The creation of tribe allows us to view those outside the tribe as "not our people" and thus allows us to fear them, hate them and hurt them while feeling justified in doing so.

I tell you now that if you are a conscious being that can feel fear, pain, rejection, joy, hope, wonderment, despair, isolation or happiness then you are in my tribe and you are of my people.

It matters not to me what you believe or how you express it.

I may well not agree with you, and in that disagreement we may struggle to respect each others point of view but that does not mean that we cannot respect each other.

The traditional place where that respect and sense of belonging exists is the family unit, but it seems self evident that in our western and individualist world the family unit no longer functions as it should and is sadly the place where most of the crimes of physical, sexual and emotional abuse take place. It seems in fact to have become one of our biggest threats to the well being of the individual.

So for us to survive the coming storm, and be sure that no political isolationism will prevent it or protect us from it, it seems that new forms of community must be formed. New bonds of affection and trust need to exist between us as communities and we need to learn how to rely on each other and be reliable to each other.

For me this begins with rigourous honesty, even if it hurts to hear it. Even if it hurts to think it and know it about ourselves.

You are all my tribe, all 7 or 8 billion of you, and there are no exceptions.

Love courage and strength to you all.




Sunday 22 January 2017

Is the situation ever hopeless? Dunkirk Human Being Camp 19th Jan 2017

So I am back working at the Human Being Camp in Dunkirk.

The atmosphere on the camp is very different than it was last year, less hopeful I feel. The population is a fraction of what it was then with about 1100 folk of all ages. A lot of children are living here and we are working on rebuilding the women's kitchen and safe space after a fire all but destroyed it a couple of weeks ago. We are working directly opposite the children's centre and it has been heartwarming to see this up and running and being enjoyed by the kids who live here. The volunteers who manage and provide this resource are doing such valuable work for our future. For children to become rounded adults with a healthy relationship with life requires that they should always have time, inclination and opportunity to do three things; 1. Play 2. Laugh 3. Learn. The Children's centre provides these traumatised and bored kids with the opportunity to do all three.

There are however fewer smiles and more dejected faces among the men on the camp young and old. There is a haunted look about them and a sense of fearful resignation on so many faces. I suspect many of these folk are suffering profound depression as they watch their lives and hopes bleed into nothing as the long days and freezing nights drag by.

Yet still I receive genuine smiles of welcome from some familiar faces and new bonds of friendship are being forged even though so many of my friends seem grim and morose.

I can hardly blame them.

It is almost a year now since this camp, the best thing Europe has to offer these people, was put together and I worked with the ABC crew and other independent volunteers to evacuate them from the mud drenched tent city of last year's "jungle" camp in Grande Synthe. In that time the dynamic of the camp has changed significantly. Although there is still a volunteer presence (the ones doing the real work as usual) it is now officially managed by an organisation called Afeji. I will refrain from commenting here about this organisation or its motivation for existing. It's not just the CRS that are supporting the fascist agenda. Talking of the CRS, they seem able to turn up at will to patrol the camp now - despite all the promises and assurances that this would not happen. Volunteers and the ever generous public need permission to come on site at all. Private security people man the gates in a permanent bad mood and the whole feel of the place is one of institutional confinement.

My heart cries out for these people. They are a people forgotten and abandoned by all but a stalwart few. A people whose hope and dream of a better life has driven them to this surreal existence in a garden shed on an old piece of disused land where every day is a choice between soul eating cold and health destroying carbon monoxide poisoning from unsuitable paraffin heaters in overcrowded cramped huts.

Today was a good day. We got a lot done and made good progress with no dramas. None for us that is. For these people life has become a dull and tragic drama played out on the world stage with them the uninspired actors while the rest of the world assume the role of an apathetic and disinterested audience.

My heart cries out to That Which Is for all of us as I think of the implications of all this - what it says about our culture and our nature. What we are becoming. What we have become.....

.....and yet the light and warmth of hope burns on in the efforts and friendship being offered by these beautiful grassroot volunteers that remain engaged with these peoples lives. The Divine Archetype and highest ideals of humanity show themselves in the willingness of those who give whatever they can - be it time, skill or money - to make life here on Earth better.

By doing so they define us. They define the quality, meaning and beauty of what it means to be alive in these times of intense upheaval.

All else I can think to say is this....

....."Je suis un refugie"